A FUNERAL IS A GROUP of people standing around talking about someone they’d rather be talking to.
Category: Life
Each moment is different. Here are some of mine.
Sometimes I Hate This Job
I’M PUTTING OFF WRITING A eulogy. Doesn’t everyone? Linda Tomback is a good friend who used to attend our Saturday morning Torah study. Her death is the eighth in our congregation in the past two years; the first two were…
Letter To A Dead Friend
Dear Sputnik, The attached photo of you arrived from a mutual friend two days ago, on what should have been your 48th birthday. I say “should” because it’s a primate conceit that the world be arranged according to our convenience.…
Rainy Day Equation
SEMI-FERAL CAT, PLUS FORCED CONFINEMENT, divided by ping-pong ball, equals nothing else.
Three Hard Things
Kicking a whale up a beach Braiding grape jelly Comforting the chronically afflicted. (1/22/09 P.S. to RW: who asked “Why would you kick a whale?” The only reason I can think of is that 1) he’s down, and 2) you’re…
Pithyism #4
NEVER YODEL NEXT TO A sleeping cat.
Modern Manners, Economywise
IF THE PERSON AHEAD OF you in the checkout line is stocking up on Meow Mix, don’t ask about their cat.
Pithyism #3, 6 or 7
SCRATCH A MYSTIC, FIND A solipsist.
And Now, A Word From (One Of) Our Sponsor(s)
AS SOME VERY GOOD PEOPLE have been very good to Ann & I during our Long Medical Night, I’d like to partly return the favor – and, hopefully, benefit the 30 or so people who read this blog. In addition…
Pithyism #10
CIVILIZATION IS NOT BASED ON agriculture, technology or finance — but solely on its members’ unspoken agreement to behave sensibly. Take that away …
School’s Out
TODAY IS THE WORST DAY (or one of the worst days) in any given year: it’s the last day I’ll be teaching religious school, which means I won’t see “my kids” any more — and I’ll be slightly stupider without…
Pithyism #999
“LAUGH. SEE?” — The Book of the SubGenius