July 4, 1776 – January 20, 2025. Magna dum duravit.
Asides
Left Side of Darkness
VISITORS TO THE METAPHORAGER MAY notice that it’s formatted in two columns — the wide right-hand one with posts, the narrow left one with other stuff. In the spirit of “obnoxious self-aggrandizement,” here’s a quick top-down guide to the “other stuff”:
– SEARCH: Cast a virtual net for your favorite in-blog keyword(s); simply type it/them in the provided space and hit “Enter.”
– RECEIVE: Input your email address and click “Subscribe” to spice your inbox with our Monday and Thursday publishings (as well as occasional off-schedule goodies like the one you’re reading now). Continue reading “Left Side of Darkness”
Overheard in Sonoma, Redux
Dear Ms. Garchik,
I just overheard the following remark while sitting in my backyard adjacent to Broadway, Sonoma’s main drag: Quoth woman to dog-walking man, “I hope in my next life I can be owned by you.”
I hope in this life you can use this quote for your daily column.
Be well,
Neal
UPDATE: Ms. G. replied, “I am going to save that one for annual romantic Valentine’s Day column!” Be on the lookout.
The Secret
WHAT THE HUMANS DIDN’T REALIZE was that, for everyone else in the galaxy, it was largely considered bad form, and even bad luck, to visit planets settled by intelligent apes. (You’d think the quality of their UFO sightings would be a tip-off.)
Fine Print
“GOD” IS NOT A FAN club.
Ol’ Thinkypants in “Thesis Envy”
“THAT’S NOT ONLY BRILLIANT — IT’S ‘why-didn’t-I-think-of-that’ brilliant.”
Let’s Try This Again
“GOD” IS THE EXPERIENCE OF “experiencing God.”
Ol’ Thinkypants in “Might As Well”
“THIS MAY OR MAY NOT be a good time to start things, but it’s a great time to continue ’em.”
Ol’ Thinkypants in “Dang Prototypes”
“BUILDING A BETTER MOUSETRAP IS one thing. Testing it is something else.”
Prayer for Wisdom
O G?D, DEAREST AND WISEST One, Maker of mercies and miracles, Describer in line and form, please: Save us from those sincere souls who know what You really meant.
Zen Spritzer
HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU are reading this?
Bromantic Disclaimer
ASTUTE READERS OF THE METAPHORAGER may have noted the default use of the masculine gender (e.g. he, him, his, man, etc.). This is due neither to a slight against the better-looking sex nor a political statement, but the love of such phrases as “MAN ON MOON” or “essential love of mankind” or “There are some things Man was not meant to know,” and as an XY kind of guy it just sort of comes natural to me.
My point is, if you’re hung up on a phrase, you’re missing the point.